Hope....?

Sometimes I get really impatient. I give up, I let go. But then something kinda hits me and I realize how stupid I was being.

Tomorrow, Tom has brain surgery. He is finally getting the surgery that he needs. In a couple of hours, he might not even remember me. Tom broke up with me a few days ago, so I'm not really sure whether I am still on his mind or not. I'm not sure if I want to be on his mind. I gave up for a couple of days... I took off my locket, erased his name off my wrist and just let go. Even though I told him that I would wait for as long as it took, I let go. He probably doesn't want me back or anything, but I have this one grain of hope.... This one single grain of hope that tomorrow, everything will be OK. Even if I am no longer part of his life, everything will be OK because his tumor will be gone. He won't be in anymore pain. I'll either be a distant memory, or I wont even be a memory at all.

Tom, if you read this post, just know that I am truly sorry. I still love you. Good luck with your surgery. And I guess, I'm still here.

<3Sam